- GTA IV - That’s Grand Theft Auto 4, for all those non-gamers out there. GTA is one of the biggest game franchises in the world and one of the few games that generates “crossover buzz.” Guess what? I have a 
problem with the attention this game is getting. Do I think it’s a bad influence? Yes. But not because of the ridiculous amounts of killing, stealing and drug slinging. GTA games encourage the easy way out. That’s right. My problem with GTA isn’t the language and glorification of violence, it’s the cheat codes. Right now, kids are figuring out how to obtain unlimited life, ammunition and cash. That is what I take issue with! Listen kids, the only way you’ll feel good about finishing that game is if you do it the right way. So what if it takes you 476 hours instead of 355. What else are you going to do with that time? Go outside? Please, that’s loser talk. I don’t mean to be a moral elitist but I when start to play GTA IV, I’m going to play the game the right way. No cheat codes. So when I run over pedestrians in stolen cars, beat down old women with a pool cue, kill my business partner and best friend because he could be holding out on a drug deal, build up a roster of prostitutes, perfect the art of racketeering and frequently take my time in aiming my sniper rifle at an innocent bystander’s melon so I can cleany remove that person’s head from their body, I’ll be taking the moral high ground.
- Emergency Preparedness Week - Next week is when we focus on how to be prepared for emergencies. Here in the Corridor, that means a lot of preparation! As the News Committee was brainstorming which 
natural disasters we have to worry about in Sea to Sky Country, we decided the list of what we don’t have to worry about is a lot shorter! Really, I think the only thing we don’t need to really prepare for is tornados. So, next week we’ll hopefully cover the details of floods, tidal waves, earthquakes, land slides and volcanos. I’m pretty comfortable with all those scenarios, except the volcano part. If a lava geyser breaks out in my back yard, I’m not particularly sure I know what to do? (note; I’ve been to the umbrella store, evidently they don’t carry any models that can deflect magma. And don’t bother asking, apparently adamentium doesn’t really exist. Agree to disagree, geology)
- Olympic Uniforms and Attire- Rob Michaels already covered this in his blog. This is terrible. Are we sure we weren’t supposed to unveil this clothing line on April 1st? You know what, I’m going to look on the bright side here. We don’t need to make new protest signs! We’ll be able to protest the games and our embarassing uniforms with the same signs! (making our athletes wear this stuff has to count as a human rights violation, right?)
- A Swedish Britney, minus the antics - The Globe and Mail’s Joshua Ostroff wrote an article about a Swede who’s supposed to be the same as Britney, only without the “problems.” Umm, is this some kind of riddle? What is Britney without the antics? Isn’t Mandy Moore the same as Britney without the antics? And how do we describe her; boring. This new girl’s name is Robyn - if she knows what’s good for her, she’ll get caught with her panties down. (is that a saying yet? I think it should be. It’s far more appropriate in our awesome 2008 culture than “caught with your pants down.”)
- Naked Bowlers - As social nude recreation picks up steam, some nudists in New West have taken to naked bowling. All I know is, when I’m at the lanes I’m paranoid enough of getting my fingers caught between bowling balls on the return rack.
BONUS CODE TRIVIA!!! Grand Theft Auto games take place in their own parallel world. While the game’s geography is very similar to actual cities such as New York and Miami, the game uses different names for those cities. GTA IV takes place in Grand Theft Auto’s version of New York City - what’s the city called?
