Cynical Cinema

There may be no better television series in history for aspiring film industry people than Dynasty. It is great because you can grab Season Three, out on DVD October 21st from Paramount Home Entertainment, and keep it lying around your house. Because life is tough for people trying to break into the film and television industry. We’re always hearing about starving actors and writers, people who make their living dressing up as Wonder Woman on Hollywood Boulevard, having their pictures taken by tourists for cash while they continually struggle to break into the business while barely making ends meet at home. It can be depressing and sad and a lonely existence. You need a pick-me up every now and then. And Dynasty IS that pick-me-up.

You can’t watch four minutes of this show without thinking “oh my God! I could do that! I can act better than that! I could write that scene on the toilet at McDonalds! I could have filmed that with my mom’s old home video camera!” There is nothing quite like watching terrible actors deliver terrible dialogue in staggeringly ridiculous scenarios to give you hope that you, too, could make it in Hollywood. What’s truly amazing about Dynasty is that so many of the actors and actresses have made it in Hollywood. A very young Heather Locklear looks gorgeous but is clearly struggling with the whole acting thing. Joan Collins was, at the time, one of the best known “actresses” in the world. Linda Evans, following her time on Dynasty, pursued a successful career as the star of a series of infomercials. It was a star-maker series!

The plot of Dynasty is standard soap-opera fare. Betrayals, sexual liasons, love triangles, jealousy, murder, power struggles, conspiracies and cliffhangers abound. It is all so gloriously cheesy and campy and staggeringly stupid that one can’t help laughing while watching, and enjoying every minute. And it makes you feel good. Because yes you, whoever “you” are, could do that. And you could do it better.