Cynical Cinema

The original Prom Night movie, while by no means a classic, was at least profitable. It made 15 million dollars upon it’s 1980 release, and inspired at least a few cult followers. It sucked, but that has never been a huge determining factor when it comes to cult followings. That cult following, however, was enough to spawn three sequels (Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night 2 made about 2 million dollars) and now a bigger budget remake in 2008. That remake comes to DVD today, August 19th, from Alliance Films, and it may even be worse than the original. Which, as I have already said, sucked. The only thing Prom Night of 2008 has in common with Prom Night of 1980 is the title. Well, that and the fact that it’s a horror movie that happens on prom night. The 2008 version, in an absolutely amazing feat for a movie that was this bad, made 43 million dollars at the box office. Here’s the basic plot:

You see, there was once a teacher at this school who became obsessed with one of his students. He murdered her family, and came after her, but was caught and locked up. Now, on Prom Night, he has managed to escape from prison. The cops know exactly where he is going - to the prom, to get Donna (played by Brittany Snow). So the cops go to the hotel where the prom is being held. And they stand around foolishly, sucking at their jobs so much that not only does this killer get into the hotel, but he is able to check in and murder four people before the alarm bell even sounds. Once that alarm bell is sounded, the girl whose life has been traumatized by this predatory stalker is…the ONLY one who doesn’t leave the hotel in single file like everyone else. You see, she forgot her SHAWL upstairs. So she goes back to her room, where of course the killer is waiting.

After a narrow escape, she runs out the door with the killer in hot pursuit, right into a bunch of cops. Who still can’t catch him. With this killer still on the loose, they bundle Donna up into a car, and take her to the only other place in the whole city where the killer would know to look for her - her house. Now, with the young girl hiding out, all alone in her room, at home, the cops continue to sweep the hotel. It’s not just that these cops have never seen a horror movie, it’s just that they are terrible police officers. And Brittany Snow is a terrible victim. She does this thing where she scrunches up her face to cry, and her screams are at best unconvincing.

The biggest problem with Prom Night, however, is that it follows every major slasher-film cliche to the T, except for the most important one. The obvious stuff is there. The cell phones that are out of service. The cop in the car outside the window that is protecting the girl, and then the second look out the window and…his car is empty! But the one horror cliche that could have saved this movie, or at least given it a moderately cool factor, is not observed. That being the cliche where no one knows who the killer is until he is unmasked at the very end! We know from the very beginning WHO the killer is, WHAT his motivation is, WHERE he will strike, WHO he is after, WHEN he will get to her, and HOW he will get to her. Which leaves precious little drama in the process.

All the worst cliches in horror movies, and none of the charming ones, combined with a film in which absolutely nothing interesting happens, makes Prom Night one of the worst films of 2008. Garbage!