Cynical Cinema

Alliance Films releases the second DVD in the Unstable Fables series today, September 9th. The first one was a charming, fresh take on the three little pigs, called Three Pigs and a Baby. This one is a charming, fresh take on the tortoise and the hare, called Tortoise vs. Hare. It’s not quite as good as the first one, mostly because it’s kinda preachy for a kids’ program. Actually, I shouldn’t say that. Dozens of kids shows are preachy and irritating. I just expected better from Jim Henson studios on this one.

You see, it has been fifteen years since the tortoise and the hare had their big race. The one where the hare, miles in the lead, figured he had time to take a nap just a few yards from the finish line. And the tortoise won. The moral of this story has always been “slow and steady wins the race”. A moral that has always bugged me. Tell that to Usain Bolt. The moral should really be “fast and NOT crushingly stupid wins the race”. Now, 15 years later, the tortoise is a rich, successful lawyer and the hare is a sketchy, daredevil used-car salesman. And they are competing for the title of Worst Father In The World, as they push their respective children into an outdoor adventure survival race in order to one-up each other.

It’s still a charming and fresh take on a familiar fairy tale, there’s just too much of that cruel-father-gets-his-comeuppance stuff for my liking. But that’s a minor complaint. Despite the cheap animation, the animals are very expressive and have great characters, and the kids love it. That’s reason enough to pick up Tortoise vs. Hare today.